自我反映(九)——100%的投入 / Self Reflection (9) — 100% Focus

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English Version Below

今天早上读到的第一段小文,也是一行禅师《你真正的家》的第二段。

一行禅师是这样说的:

“Be there truly. Be there with 100 percent of yourself. In every moment of your daily life. That is the Essence of true Buddhist meditation. Each of us know that we can do that, so let us train to live each moment of our daily life deeply. That is why I like to define mindfulness as the energy that helps us to be there 100 percent. It is the energy of your true presence.”

“真正的投入。把自己的100%投入在你生活中的每时每刻。这才是佛教徒禅修的精髓。我们都知道我们是做得到的,因此我们应该训练自己完全地活在当下。这就是为何我总是把正念诠释为让我们完全100%投入的工具与能量。这才是你真我的能量。”

在我送走2016年时,我就已经拟好了一份计划,而当中没有列出来的其中一个就是把自己的工作做好,在上班时间完全地投入。那样子,我就可以心安理得地告诉自己已经尽力了,下班之后不必再为工作而烦恼,可以更专心地去寻找以及提升自我。

通过正念的认识,我也告诉自己每做一件事都要完全地投入。因此,步行的时候,我尽量把注意力放在脚上,喝水的时候尽量体验喝水的感受。

可是,直至今日,我还是会在不经意间忘了正念,总是后知后觉。

而今天在工作方面也没有做到100%,一直感觉心有余而力不足,时而望着电脑屏幕憨憨发呆。

早上等巴士上班时,在手机上和玲玲的一段对话让我知道我的自修还没到我想要的进度。她的短信使我感觉困扰与烦躁。我尝试关照黄庭中的那股情绪,企图与它和平共处。可是那股气流一直在黄庭里不停地翻滚。

唯一感到安慰的是在这方面我已经到了当知当觉,至少可以克制自己发出不好听的短信。

09.01.2017

文/林顺源


This morning, I read in the great monk, Thich Nhat Hanh’s book and it says:

“Be there truly. Be there with 100 percent of yourself. In every moment of your daily life. That is the Essence of true Buddhist meditation. Each of us know that we can do that, so let us train to live each moment of our daily life deeply. That is why I like to define mindfulness as the energy that helps us to be there 100 percent. It is the energy of your true presence.”

As I sent year 2016 away, I have already drafted my plan for the coming years (my Project L.O.V.E) and doing my job well is something that I have thought but did not list it down. I promised myself to be fully engaged when I am at work. With that, I will then be able to say to myself that I have done my best, and will not worry about work after I knock off, so that I can spend more time in searching for my inner peace and soul.

And through the concept of mindfulness, I have also promised myself to focus on all my actions. As I walk, I focus on my legs, as I drink, I focus on the sensation of drinking water.

But till today, I have forgotten to maintain that mindfulness many a times.

I didn’t put in my 100% in work today, as I felt restless and found myself staring at the monitor screen blankly.

I had a not so nice WhatsApp conversation with Elaine and it just reminded me that I have yet to see any improvement from my meditation. I have tried to observe my emotions, and be together with them instead of chasing them away, but still I could not truly subdue them.

The only encouragement I had was that I am more aware of my emotions now, and managed to prevent myself from making ugly statements over the chat.

09.01.2017

Francis Lim

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